Tag Archive for: First Contact Ministries

Bible Study Lesson on Addiction - Week 16 of the Overcome Curriculum by Joshua Staton

Anger & Clarity

Miosis – Lesson 16 of the Overcome Bible Study Lesson on Addiction

One of the more problematic results of anger is that it clouds your vision and blinds you to facts, impeding decision making. But usually, we find this out after the fact. After we cool down we normally realize we shouldn’t have said that. Then you get the honor of having to be on clean-up detail. This is not a fun place to be, and if you frequent it too many times, you’ll find yourself casually purchasing an apartment there in the realm of lost compassion from those you have hurt. This becomes your new living arrangement. And no matter how much you think you can keep the different areas of your life compartmentalized and un-affected from anger, it will eventually spill over, just like every other sin. We think we can hide it when we have to, until it outgrows the closet and bursts into the living room, when you are entertaining in-laws. Learn more about the concepts of anger and clarity in this “Overcome” Bible Study Lesson on Addiction.

You see, there is a strange cathartic stage, if you will, much like the first real moments of sobriety, where the scales have fallen off of your eyes and you begin to see. You begin to see things that you didn’t know were there, you see things that you never paid attention to in the past, mostly yourself and your actions. This nauseating stage can be likened to when you wake up to a bright beam of sunlight that has found its way through the tiniest of cracks in your bedroom window curtains and landed upon your pupil. That instant that your pupil constricts, that slight twinge of pain, squinting and scrunching your face to somehow shut your eyes even tighter to block out the sadistic ray… time to face the day.

The conflict that goes on during this time, when you really begin to see who you are, can be contrasted between darkness; operated by anger, and light; clarity, being who we once were versus who we were made to be. This light may be foreign and initially discomforting, but once you get used to it, it makes going back into the darkness all the more repulsive.

When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.

John 8:12

Opening a Can of Worms

I opened up a can of worms the first time I taught this specific class when I asked the question “What makes you angry?” Which has led me to including the following disclaimer: It is not up to me or another person to validate or invalidate your anger. All I can do is point you to scripture. I do not have the spiritual discernment to judge the motives or heart of another person, I can’t even judge my own properly.

Chances are that, based on my possibly faulty perspective, I have a 50/50 chance of looking at the situation wrongly to begin with. Then it becomes a heads or tails if I make the right or wrong decision. Why, because I may not have all the correct information and my own personal experience and taste regarding the subject. Which leads us to our next stop in this discussion, righteous anger and our own point of view.

Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil.

Ephesians 4:26

If anger is something you find yourself dealing with, then just as with any other sin, we must make ourselves as aware as possible with our inner self. Often, we find ourselves justifying our anger. There is such a thing as righteous anger, or indignation. While anger is ok and a part of life, we must be especially careful to not chalk up outbursts to righteous anger. The easiest way to do this is asking yourself do you get angry at everything else God gets angry about, or is it only a few select items. What makes you angry, may not make me angry. Likewise, there are a few issues I have a personal history with that have become burdens to me when I see them occur or I am the recipient of such treatment. In other words, I am not necessarily angry with them offending God, but more the fact that I have been offended. God’s word is pretty clear on this point:

Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all.

Romans 12:17

It’s not a question of do you get angry or if you get angry. It’s more a question of why do you get angry and how do you handle it. Many times, when anger strikes it is in my weakest areas and people are watching me to see how I am going to react. It’s during these opportunities that come at the worst times, a chance for others to see Jesus in me, not the me within me.

The Roaring Lion

Truth be told, there are so many applications and directions we could go with this scripture. So, please hear me, what I teach out of this scripture is not the only thing there. There are other nuggets that can be drawn out such as: adversary, prowling, watchful or even generational. But for the intent of this study, I want to define a few words to tease out a logically implied cost.

Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.

1 Peter 5:8

To devour means by any and all methods necessary, to consume entirely. To eat you up. Anger is typically built up and compounded over many situations and circumstances. It develops as we think about, talk about and get worked up about. We become ticking time bombs when we collect and find it hard to contain during the bottling process, firing passive aggressive warning shots across the bow of those who have offended. Like Chunk so clearly put in the Goonies, “That’s all I can stand, and I can’t stand no more!”

To be sober-minded and watchful is a choice. It is a quality and a description of that choice. It is not a feeling, but rather an intentional call to action, to be alert. Sometimes it is best to walk away from an argument. Sometimes it is actively choosing to starve the anger instead of feeding it. So much of gaining this clarity is from dwelling on scripture itself. Making a choice to apply scriptural guidance rather than scratching the itch of vengeance.

Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.

James 1:19

Overcome Bible Study Lesson on Addiction – Week 16
Application – Dredging

In a bit of transparency regarding this topic, I allowed many of the wrongs done to me in my younger years to generate feelings of anger and anti-social behavior. This anger resulted in a self-imposed isolation and de-valuing almost every other human I came into contact with. Because of allowing the trauma and anger to devour me, I became a drastically different person than what I imagined God designed me to be originally. Much of how I handled anger resulted in me misunderstanding God and directed misplaced hate towards Him for allowing the rejection, neglect and abuse. Handling anger wrongly cost me years and relationships I will never get back.

The main point is this, if you constantly find yourself erring on the side of anger as the go-to reaction to “unpleasant” things, there is a chance that you are allowing yourself to be devoured, and this isn’t one of those pictures of buzzards sitting on top of a carcass out in the desert, it is a lion with its head buried in the gazelles’ ribcage eating it from the inside out. With anger, everything can change in a moment and it usually does.  Below is a graphic of two words imposed on each other. See if you can figure out this visual puzzle:

Bible Study Lesson on Addiction - Anger Clouds our Vision

Anger clouds your vision and your reasoning. Powerful emotions like anger clouds your vision, it blinds you and obscures your vision, like clarity in who Jesus is. We do not want to devour ourselves or others. Know, that whatever the offense, Jesus’ death on the cross paid it. This is especially difficult when it appears that God is not bringing justice to the situation. We are all screwed up, and we are all in debt. We do not want to allow the devil to drive us to want to devour others, any more so than wanting to be devoured ourselves.

The “Overcome” Bible Study Lesson on Addiction is part of the discipleship program at First Contact Ministries in Hendersonville, NC.

Did you miss the other lessons in this series? Click see the entire Overcome Bible Study on Addiction series.

We always look forward to meeting new people at our Tuesday night support group meetings at 6:30 pm, located at Mud Creek Church in Hendersonville, NC.  Our classes are designed to teach biblical principles for addiction recovery through discipleship.  Our goal is to show the love of Jesus by supporting those who need it most.

For more information or to purchase “The Resistance” by Josh Staton to use as a Christian leadership book, or curriculum for an addiction recovery class, please visit: The Resistance: Becoming A Servant Leader Through the Beatitudes Christian Leadership Book

Captivity & Freedom

To Turn Around – Lesson 12 of the “Overcome” Faith-based Addiction Recovery Bible Study

 

The word captivity insinuates that someone or something has control over you.  It could be from a battle lost and you are now hostage or the act of slavery. The majority of time, whatever it is that holds you captive could care less about your well-being.  You jump when it says jump. You go when it says go. Shackled and in chains. Learn more about obtaining freedom in this lesson of the “Overcome” Faith-based Addiction Recovery Bible Study series.

Throughout this post, I will be using some old testament, churchy sounding words; sin, sacrifice, confession, repentance and glory.  I will attempt to describe them in such a way that the essence of them is illustrated and clear up some of the fog that may be surrounding them.  Understanding these words is crucial for grasping a hold of the concept of being a slave to sin or walking in the freedom of Christ. I honestly believe that if we can get this down, it will be a turning point in our lives, both presently and eternally.

I have humbly accepted the realization that there is nothing I can say or do that will affect what someone believes, unless I act like a madman and then they may believe I am all sixes and sevens.  Which thankfully for you and me, trying to change what another person believes is not my job. My job is to illustrate, as clearly as I can from my own point of view what I myself believe, and to reflect that in my outer words and actions, although I do fail often.

At some point in each of our walks, beliefs move from a point of struggle to fact.  From my own experience, whatever seems to be the loudest in my life, gets all of my attention and without thinking about it, I soon start shifting my beliefs.  Ignoring or acting like the following three facts are not true does not make them any less factual, the same way that gravity does not require your belief.

  1.  We all sin.  We almost always err to the side of our humanness.  Humans are notorious for sinful behavior. Sin essentially means you are actively choosing to go against what God has said.  Sin is rooted within the self of each of us. Sin does not consider the cost or weigh the outcome. Put simply, it means chasing your desires regardless of the damage it will create.
  2.  Sin will always lead to suffering.  That suffering may take form of spiritual, physical, mental or emotional slavery and separation from a Holy God, from family members and from friends.  Sin hurts, sin is deadly and the debt it incurs has to be covered somehow, just like in the Garden of Eden when Adam and Eve first sinned. When they sinned, they recognized they were naked and God sacrificed an animal to cover their nakedness, their sin.
  3.  We, ourselves, cannot heal the sin and suffering in any lasting way.  The best we can hope for is to find a distraction. In other words, we cannot reach success when attempting to work our way into freedom.  When we attempt to do this, we are trying to justify ourselves based on the law. The law is not meant to save, but rather to judge. The law is meant to condemn the accused.

These three facts are the basis for understanding the severity of our situation.  As Romans 3 says “all have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God.” Once we begin to reach a level of awareness and maturity, these facts lead to two actions: confession and repentance.

Confession of one’s sins is when we take responsibility for what we have done.  We do not hide the sin any longer. We go to God and acknowledge our wrong doings, our trespasses, and ask His forgiveness.    We do this because He is a just God, full of mercy, as scripture says, “He is faithful to forgive.”

Repentance is a Greek military term that means to turn around.  Imagine a squadron is marching due east when the captain bellows “Halt.”  The procession comes to a screeching stop. The captain then yells out “Repent” and the entire squadron spins on their heels and begins marching to the west.  In our spiritual lives, repentance means that we will stop going in the direction that is rebellious to God’s command and walk in the opposite direction.

If you are free…

Right now, if I were to ask you, are your thoughts, beliefs or actions were most influential, what would your answer be?  I am convinced one of these are the most powerful for each of us. If something gains control over you, it can affect how you handle situations, react to bad news, even what you would choose to kill for or die for.  One of these keeps you in slavery or releases you into freedom. One of these will most commonly make your decisions. One of these will be your yoke.

For freedom Christ has set us free, stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to the yoke of slavery.

Galatians 5:1

Now, suppose I asked you what freedom meant to you, could you answer it?  As a teenager, what did it feel like when you got a little taste of freedom from your parents and their rules, even if for an hour?  We sowed our wild oats and learned about the real world, stuff you can’t learn under your parent’s roof. We get our first speeding ticket, for example, and hopefully learn not to speed again.  Notice at the end of the verse above, Paul says “…and do not submit again…” Again.  But for whatever reason, we enjoyed the thrill of it.  Went back to school and relived the entire moment over for our friends.  However though, there is a cost associated with this example, our insurance premium has now risen, which means we will now have to figure out how to cover the cost.

This is a fairly harmless example, but within it exists a core concept.  Eleanor Roosevelt said, “With freedom comes responsibility.” Jesus has established this freedom for us.  Our responsibility is to not submit again. Resist. If the desires of your heart are constantly leaving you to pick up the check, if our thoughtless habits are dictating our very existence day to day, or if the belief that God is angry and distant, we have to wipe the sleep from our eyes and realize we are bound in slavery to something other than God’s truth and plan.

“Overcome” – Faith-based Addiction Recovery Bible Study

Application – what are you doing with your freedom?

At any given moment during the day I am submitting, the only variable is whom I am serving.  Am I serving myself; my desires, my selfish pursuits, my fame or fortune? Or am I serving a loving God that has supplied me with talents and gifts to build His kingdom, something that is everlasting and not temporal?  I feel that too many times, we prescribe to the thought that the Christian walk is something that is devoid of freedom or joy. God did not set out to make little replicas of the exact same person. No, He shows His creativity and handiwork because of our differences.  We each are unique, with our own personalities and special gifts. This leads us to our concluding thought, it’s not so much the question of what we do, but why we do it. The following two verses illustrate this concept, the first verse addressing the what, and the second facilitates the why:

You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.

Deuteronomy 6:5

And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

Colossians 3:17

When we are in slavery, we are unable to truly love God with all of our heart, soul and might.  Choosing to be a slave to sin impedes our decision to walk in freedom. We may want to be free, but our actions say otherwise.  Consistent choices dictate what we really believe. The second verse is where we find our freedom, in whatever we do in the name of Jesus.  If you are a single mother, a factory worker, a school bus driver, a struggling artist; do it with the intention of bringing glory to God alone.  This is the why behind why you do what you do.  So, I ask you, if you are free, what are you doing with your freedom?  Are you going back to patterns that encourage a lifestyle of slavery to sin or are you walking out your freedom through a relationship with Jesus Christ?  Can you say about every decision and thought, whatever it is, that it will be done in the name of Jesus for God’s glory? If you knew you were free, what would you be doing right now that shows that you have accepted and honored that freedom?

The “Overcome” Faith-based Addiction Recovery Bible Study is part of the discipleship program at First Contact Ministries in Hendersonville, NC.

Did you miss the other lessons in this series? Click see the entire Overcome Faith-based Addiction Recovery Bible Study  series.

We always look forward to meeting new people at our Tuesday night support group meetings at 6:30 pm, located at Mud Creek Church in Hendersonville, NC.  Our classes are designed to teach biblical principles for addiction recovery through discipleship.  Our goal is to show the love of Jesus by supporting those who need it most.

For more information or to purchase “The Resistance” by Josh Staton to use as a Christian leadership book, or curriculum for an addiction recovery class, please visit: The Resistance: Becoming A Servant Leader Through the Beatitudes Christian Leadership Book

Christian Recovery Bible Study

Turmoil & Peace

Prepare for Conflict – Lesson 10 of the “Overcome” Christian Recovery Bible Study

Focusing on the circumstances of our situations, we can become unsure of our environments and insecure in our identity.  Most of the time, this feeling begins in our early childhood and grows… and grows… and grows into an uncontrollable storm.  And eventually we are as if a tiny boat on a stormy sea. Tossed back and forth from the crashing waves. Being ready for a disaster and prepared for an emergency can be the difference between life or death during floods, earthquakes and hurricanes.  Shouldn’t we also apply that same level of immediacy with our spiritual selves? Follow along to find encouragement for the journey in this lesson of the “Overcome” Christian recovery Bible study.

Throughout this journey of leading groups, I have come upon the conclusion there are two camps of individuals; those who have committed to their recovery and those who have not.  This lesson is for the first group: the ones that have committed to the journey. And a call to be aware of the costs that are involved. A level of consideration and appreciation of the cost and resulting conflict is required for successful commitment.  Jesus even referred to the need for this awareness of the cost:

For which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it?

Luke 14:28

The Overcome course was essentially built around the anchor verse of scripture we cover in this post, for the reason of what I experienced during my own recovery.  The fact that even though I was committed to following Jesus and pursuing recovery, I had not taken into consideration an important fact: life is full of turmoil, and that turmoil has the tendency to steal your perspective, hope and joy.

I do not have to prod very much to get you to think about the biggest source of your turmoil.  It can range from recovery itself and making it through one day at a time, to the rebuilding of a broken relationship, finding employment, or finding a place to live.  Whatever it is, keep it in mind as we progress through this lesson. Because knowing helps you prepare for it.

Most of the turmoil we face is due to lack of preparation.  Preparation in this respect begins with the acknowledgement that we are a conflicted species.  The history of our existence is messy to say the least. Our existence is defined by how we respond to these conflicts which reveal our beliefs and character.  Conflicts are trials and processes that either bring us closer to God or drive us away from Him. One of the most critical means of having perspective in conflict is embodied in the verse below:

In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.

1 Peter 1:6-‬7‬‬

Most of our conflict resides internally.  We are pulled in opposite directions between what is right and what is wrong.  Between our desires and our wisdom. If you are a disciple, a Christ follower, you will always have internal conflict.  The self is its own worst enemy, by making the choice to rebel against proper wisdom and instruction. The key is to think eternally though…

For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out.

Romans 7:15, ‬18‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬

External conflict is public and relationship based.  This person doesn’t get along with this other person. They don’t see eye to eye.  Many of the struggles we face coming via this avenue are due to our mishandling of reactions.  We must adopt a grander picture of the battlefield and realize these are opportunities for growth:

Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

James 1:2-‬4

‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬Now that we have covered the easier ones, we must acknowledge the most significant.  One that we take for granted at times, because we do not see it with the naked eye. The spiritual or eternal conflict and the value we associate with it.  If we indeed believe there is a heaven, and that we are not of this world, then technically that should have a direct impact on how we live. There are forces at play that we don’t see that bear a cosmic connotation to this conflict that encourages us to overlook it, much to our chagrin.

For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.

Ephesians 6:12

The Gravity of the Situation

The last supper takes place in John chapters 13-16.  While the synoptic gospels Matthew, Mark and Luke all give accounts of the last supper, only John gives this level of detail.  This was an intimate setting and portrait of Jesus spending His last hours with the disciples. His intent was to prepare them for the difficulties that lie ahead.  He had led and taught these men for the past three years. During this account, He washes their feet, calls out Judas for future betrayal, promises the Holy Spirit, alerts them to coming persecution, His own death and resurrection and that He is going to prepare a place for them in heaven.

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace.  In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.

John 16:33

Imagine the inner conflict going on in this scene:  Jesus knows that Judas is going to betray him and that everyone will scatter and deny him.  He knows He is about to die a painful and shameful death. He knows the entire plan of God rests on his obedience, even unto death, for the very ones whose sin will place Him on the cross.  As far as literature goes, this is the climax of the story. 66 books of canon and 31,102 verses all pointing to or from this event. This is the culmination of everything that has preceded and will follow.  

He acknowledged the gravity of the situation and did not run from it or ignore it.  He understood what was at stake not only for the disciples but for all who would follow.  You see the effects of this inner turmoil on Him while sweating blood during repeated prayers to “take this cup”.  He shows his obedience by uttering “…but Your will be done.” He knew the gravity of what was going on.

For us, we must acknowledge the gravity of our situations.  He gave us the example of not giving up and being obedient. He acknowledged the brutal reality of life on this world but offered perspective.  For us to stay committed to our spiritual walks and recovery, we must accept this perspective as truth. We stay the course through the turmoil, not running and hiding from it.  Family members may not welcome you back with open arms. Friends may never trust you again. Finding a job may be next to impossible. Which is precisely why He ends this verse with “But take heart, I have overcome the world.”  We do not rely on our strength or temporary victories, we hold on to His ultimate victory, even when it seems like we have lost yet another battle, He has won the war.

“Overcome” – Christian Recovery Bible Study
Application – Contingency Plan

Whatever conflict you are facing right now, you have two options: run from it and try your best to hide or run to God and His Word.  We cannot outrun conflict, but we can seek Him in the midst of it. Be well prepared when the waves start crashing in, not running for sandbags in the middle of a torrential downpour.  The best way we can prepare is to acknowledge the turmoil and seek His word on it. Research the word, find a verse or even a single word to hold on to. Claim it as your own. Write it down and put it somewhere you will see it every day and memorize it.

Many have asked me what I held on to during the early stages of recovery.  I attribute this question to the nautical term the bitter end.  The bitter end is the last link on the chain of an anchor.  In popular terms it means the conclusion of a difficult or unpleasant situation.  During the time I found my rock bottom I had no support system and was out cast and alienated due to my actions. I wasn’t a Christ follower but knew something had to change.  Learning how to live the Christian life while reconciling with no earthly encouragement was one of my most difficult times in life. Everything in me cried out for the old, the familiar.  The early stage of recovery is one of the most vital and most memorable times of your journey. The difficult part is knowing what to prepare for and knowing what your anchor is. For me, the bitter end was the verses below.  What verses do you hold on to when the conflict comes?

but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

Romans 5:8

“What man of you, having a hundred sheep, if he has lost one of them, does not leave the ninety-nine in the open country, and go after the one that is lost, until he finds it?

Luke 15:4

The “Overcome” Christian Recovery Bible Study is part of the discipleship program at First Contact Ministries in Hendersonville, NC.

Did you miss the other lessons in this series? Click see the entire Overcome Christian Recovery Bible Study  series.

We always look forward to meeting new people at our Tuesday night support group meetings at 6:30 pm, located at Mud Creek Church in Hendersonville, NC.  Our classes are designed to teach biblical principles for addiction recovery through discipleship.  Our goal is to show the love of Jesus by supporting those who need it most.

For more information or to purchase “The Resistance” by Josh Staton to use as a Christian leadership book, or curriculum for an addiction recovery class, please visit: The Resistance: Becoming A Servant Leader Through the Beatitudes Christian Leadership Book

Overcome- Christian Addiciton Recovery Guide

Regret & Discernment

The Aftermath- Lesson 8 of the “Overcome” Christian Addiction Recovery Guide

We all make mistakes, some worse than others.  However, the tragedy is when we make mistakes that could have been avoided.  Feelings such as regret, shame and guilt often accompany this type of mistake.   The best way to judge such decisions is by observing the outcome, what it produced, destroyed, solved or created.  Did it result in failure or success? Working backwards we can gauge the validity and motivation for many decisions we make, and whether it produced the intended outcome. Follow along in this lesson of the “Overcome” Christian addiction recovery guide to learn more about making decisions without regret or shame.

Decisions, decisions, decisions.  I’m sure we have all made decisions we have immediately regretted.  Most of these decisions, I would wager, have been made in the heat of the moment when emotions were high.  Was the situation appraised logically or was it based on feeling? Did we know better, as my grandmother used to say, but just didn’t do better, even though we have seen the outcome at least a dozen times or more?  Hangovers, arguments and knee-jerk reactions come to mind.

Many individuals I have worked with in the past quantify their sobriety in years, months and days.  However, whether it was their first or hundredth attempt, many measure their recovery in hours. This observation, along with observing myself, has led me to the following statement:

Regret will always follow the decision to rebel.

Deductive Reasoning

The context of the following scripture is Paul writing to the church in Philippi when he was imprisoned for his spiritual beliefs.  He could have chosen to conform and keep his head low, but he didn’t. He chose to do what was right even though it cost him his freedom and eventually his life.  By human accounts, this could be considered a bad decision. Thankfully for us, God is divine and at the wheel, not a human.

And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.

Philippians 1:6

Before we go any further, I want to delineate the difference between guilt and shame using another of my grandmother’s sayings.  Are you sorry you did it, or sorry you got caught?  Guilt is sorry for doing it, shame is sorry you got caught.  Guilt is Godly conviction, shame is not. Regret and remorse are products of disobedient decisions.  It is when we go against that still, small voice that helps and instructs us. Some call it a conscience, I call it the Holy Spirit.  

And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper, to be with you forever, even the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees him nor knows him. You know him, for he dwells with you and will be in you.

John 14:16-17

The more you listen to that little voice, the louder it gets.  The less you listen, the more silent it becomes. It’s the idea of whatever you feed is going to grow.  The good news is that we don’t have to stay in this state of regret. Even when Adam and Eve were dealing with their regret, God was preparing a plan.  We do things we will regret because it is part of our sin nature. We love to do something we have been told not to do. Shame has been just as responsible for relapses as has pride.  Regret is a breeding ground for creating a perpetual cycle of self-loathing, in which we tune out that little voice that says come back.

Embrace the Process

With the price being high for regrettable decisions, we have to first understand what it is we are risking.  Some poor decisions are recoverable. Some are not. We risk hurting ourselves and those we love. To do this, we go back to a section of the verse in Philippians, He who began a good work in you.  There is a context of progression here.  A process of God refining your character.  It is the same sort of progression that is identified in the following verse:

When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways.

1 Corinthians 13:11

Discernment is accepting Godly counsel and statues for proper living.  It starts off small and grows larger. Like a masterpiece that God is painting, you are an investment of love.  Learning to make decisions that you won’t regret is a large part of the good work Paul speaks of. When you come to Christ, He begins the transformation process, a good work

We define discernment the way the Hebrews and Greeks did, the idea of considering and examining.   Discernment is asking what will this decision cost me or others? It is fighting the urge to react.  It’s the idea of making decisions you won’t regret. Not being driven by desires or emotions and having to pay the price for failure.  The goal is not to do something stupid today, that I will have to pay for tomorrow.

The “Overcome” Christian Addiction Recovery Guide
Application – 1 Simple Statement

We will finish out our topic with a contrast of two of Jesus’ disciples.  One of them made a horrific decision and chose not to deal with it, the other made an equally horrible decision, but addressed it.  One committed suicide because of remorse, the other repented and received grace.

Judas betrayed Jesus for some money.  He listened to Satan and allowed a poor decision to lead to regret, which ultimately resulted in him taking his own life:

And throwing down the pieces of silver into the temple, he departed, and he went and hanged himself.

Matthew 27:5

Peter on the other hand was adamant that he would never betray or deny Jesus.  To which Jesus responded by telling him that he would in fact do so. After experiencing this heartbreak and repenting, Peter would become the rock on which Jesus built His church.

And immediately the rooster crowed a second time. And Peter remembered how Jesus had said to him, “Before the rooster crows twice, you will deny me three times.” And he broke down and wept.

Mark 14:72

Discernment is not just about knowing better, it is about acting accordingly.  Through repentance, God develops our character and carries on a good work. It is about obedience and striving to do better, not stay in the same rut.  Just because we have made bad decisions, does not mean we continue making them. Which leads us to our one simple statement:

If regret doesn’t lead to repentance, it will only lead to remorse.

The “Overcome” Addiction Bible Study is part of the discipleship program at First Contact Ministries in Hendersonville, NC.

Did you miss the other lessons in this series? Click see the entire Overcome Christian Addiction Recovery Guide series.

We always look forward to meeting new people at our Tuesday night support group meetings at 6:30 pm, located at Mud Creek Church in Hendersonville, NC.  Our classes are designed to teach biblical principles for addiction recovery through discipleship.  Our goal is to show the love of Jesus by supporting those who need it most.

For more information or to purchase “The Resistance” by Josh Staton to use as a Christian leadership book, or curriculum for an addiction recovery class, please visit: The Resistance: Becoming A Servant Leader Through the Beatitudes Christian Leadership Book

 

"The Resistance" Biblical Leadership Book - Lesson 7 by Author Joshua Staton.
"The Resistance"  Biblical Leadership Book - Lesson 7 by Author Joshua Staton.

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.

Matthew 5:9

“The Resistance” Biblical Leadership Book Lesson 7: Seek to Reconcile

To be a peacemaker is to not encourage conflict, to seek peace instead of hostility, to spur reconciliation instead of estrangement.  We grow spiritually by baby steps through mere obedience by resisting knee jerk reactions when provoked.  However, as we mature, we begin to understand and see with clearer eyes how to disarm potentially volatile situations and subdue enmity.  Anywhere humans are present, disagreements will follow.  How those disagreements are addressed is what we must concern ourselves with this week.

To fully understand this Beatitude we have to grasp the second half:  being called sons of God.

For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God
Romans 8:14

for in Christ Jesus you are all sons of God, through faith.
Galatians 3:26

But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God,
John 1:12

In life it seems that it is becoming harder and harder to find peace, which is why it is all the more important to exert effort to become a peacemaker.  Everywhere you turn, homes, churches and communities are affected negatively because of disagreements and opinions.  All of the verses above point to one answer:  the work and urgings of the Holy Spirit.  We must seek to be led by the Spirit in all instances and especially in caustic situations.

Application

Looking throughout Jesus’ ministry, He was met with immense opposition, yet he never once got into an argument or a shouting match to prove Himself.  He exhibited a quiet and strong confidence in every instance of attack.  He is the Spirit that is to lead us.  Primarily, a Godly leader must first be led by the example set forth by the Spirit before we can effectively lead others through these heightened times of struggle and engagement.  As Proverbs 12:20 says, we should plan peace.

As leaders, we will be under constant attack; some clearly defined and others more subtle.  Contention and strife are like an eroding cliff with a house sitting on top of it.  In life, opposition will always be lurking, trying to halt progress and distract.  As we learn from the Spirit how to lead, it will urge us toward more strategic decisions, in the sense of not keeping enemies as enemies, but rather transforming them to allies.  This is what God did for us through His son, Jesus.

A final note regarding reconciling and repairing relationships, there will be instances that reconciliation is just not available at that time.  Our responsibility is to do what God lays on our heart.  We are incapable of changing the mind or behaviors of others, but we must be obedient to do our part.

Character in Action (Biblical Leadership Book Homework)

Read Romans 8 and examine your objective over the past weeks.

  • Have you met opposition that eroded any of the progress you have made?
  • Were there any situations that needed to be diffused?  How did you handle them?

Take time and assess your progress, next week we begin addressing how to maintain momentum when life hits you full force.

Prayer

Our Heavenly Father, only You are good and perfect and steadfast.  We confess that we have not been peacemakers with You throughout our lives.  We thank You that we are able to be reconciled to you through Your Son Jesus.  Please draw near to us, that we are able to draw near to You and learn how to handle opposition in a way pleasing to You.  In Your great name, amen.

For more information or to purchase “The Resistance: , please visit:

The Resistance: Becoming A Servant Leader Through the Beatitudes Book

If you are in the Hendersonville, NC area, join us for an addiction recovery class. Click for more information on attending a First Contact Ministries support group for individuals or families struggling with addiction issues.

Did you miss the other lessons? Click see the entire “Resistance”: Becoming a Servant Leader Through the Beatitudes Biblical Leadership Book